Sacrifice

March 27, 2011 at 6:17pm

I just can't help but feel a little sad that the girls and I came home and had to leave Chaz behind. It is the first time we have left him. For all these years, he has been on the leaving end. It is so weird to be on this end.
For off and on for 12 years now, I have packed him up and sent him all over the world. He has been to more places internationally then I think I will ever get a chance to go. The girls and I are very comfortable with him leaving. It has become normal to have him for a little bit and then only have him via phone and internet. Don't get me wrong we still miss him like crazy, but I made my peace with his job a long time ago. When he deployed to Afghanistan, Deryn didn't even cry, what does that tell you?!
When I met Chaz he said he always wanted to be a soldier and serve his country. I knew going into this relationship that I would have to give him up to his job. The funny thing is when he joined the Army the biggest threat we had was a 6 month peacekeeping mission to the Balkan areas. Then some men changed all of our lives when they decided to fly planes into buildings. As we approach the 10th anniversary of 9-11 it's interesting to see the ramifications of those acts still fail like dominos. And now one of those dominos has struck the Allen household. I have full faith that our leaders know what they are doing, but as I leave my husband in a hospital to heal from an IED I can't help but question some of those decisions. These are the moments I thank God for giving me faith in Him and know that everything will be ok. I want to know how people survive this without faith, hope and love.
And then there's the girls. Our two beautiful girls have grown up with nothing but terror threats and war. I banned the news from our home back in 2006 when the news reported that Chaz's entire company had been killed in Iraq. After allowing them to control my mind and convince me I was a widow, I hit the power button and now only watch the news for the weather. I can't stand the thought of raising our girls in a world of fear. The world is a great place full of exciting opportunities. Our girls need to be aware of the world, but not afraid. This is why we have simply told them that Chaz stepped on an explosion. We do not want them to hate the people of Afghanistan. That is unfair to both our girls and the people of that country. We do not hate the people of Afghanistan. We actually don't hate anyone. We have told the girls that this is God's plan for us and we must have faith in that plan. There's no time for hate in our family. First hate takes up too much time. Hate is an ignorant emotion. If you truly look you will see you only hate something because you don't understand it. We can sit and hate but why. It will not solve a thing. Hate simply creates more hate and who wants to live in that kind of world, not us! And that's not a world to raise children in either.
I also have to laugh at God's sense of humor. I have prayed so many times for Chaz to be ours for good. This is totally not what I had in mind. But I will take it, because I still have him. He may have lost 2 legs, has a broken elbow and a ton of scars, but he's still our Chaz. God saved the most important parts, his heart, his brain and his personality. Since he spared these pieces I knew from our first phone call that everything would be ok. Seeing him for the first time and seeing that smile simply proved that fact. Chaz is one amazing person and together we can conquer anything! I am just so thankfuil that within 8 short weeks our little family will be together forever. I know the easy thing is to pack them up and move them to DC, but Chaz still has a big surgery to conquer and I stand by the fact that hospitals are not the place for children. The girls proved to us this week that we made the right decision by leaving them in TN. Kids are kids. They want to play and have fun. Walter Reed has done an excellent job of thinking about the kids, but the kids still get stir crazy. So we will continue on with our plan.
Please continue to pray for our family. Please especially pray for the elbow surgery coming up. We want Chaz to have as much success as possible. God is listening, please lift us up.
=) Jessica

Love is the Best!!

Our marriage and relationship has never been in jeopardy. The d-word has never been used around here unless we're joking about it, which we do frequently. I always knew Chaz and I went meant to be together. However, we are opposites when it comes to personalities, but we are such a good match for each other. I guess opposites do attract, this is where I laugh in the face of science.


This tragedy has proven to us how much we love each other and how much we need each other. We are the one for each other, no doubts about it. I have always enjoyed that fact that Chaz still gives me butterflies in my stomach all the time. It is amazing that someone can do that to you, even after 12 years together. My adorable hubby can just look at me and I melt. I seriously love it. Thanks to this accident he and I have been able to have many long talks about all sorts of things and I have enjoyed every single one of them. We are so in tune with each other, I can rate his pain for him. Pretty crazy, huh?! He says he hates when I leave because the nurses seem to move a lot faster when I am here. He says I've got them under my spell too.

Then you add in these awesome kids of ours. Seriously could life get any better?! I could sit here and come up with reasons to be angry. I could dwell on why, but instead I can't help but think about how blessed I am. My incredible husband is still with me and together we can finish raising these two little cuties. It may sound simple, but the greatest things grown from the tiniest seeds. That is exactly how I look at our situation. We will plant the seeds of love and hope and we will reap the rewards later. God will lead us through the storm and help us move forward.

I hope that everyone can be blessed with the same type of love at least once in your life. I cannot imagine living life without it. I wish for our girls to have this kind of love. I can only hope they will. I can only hope they look to us for guidance and grow from that. Our journey is far from complete, but with our faith and love this journey will be incredible.
=) Jessica

Last Night!

Last night we decided to venture out for the first time. We had a ton of success with this outing. Chaz was comfortable (which is the most important thing) and we all had a really great time. He wasn't thrilled about his entree, but I think he was looking for something else (something more autherntic). We will venture out somewhere else next time to hopefully find exactly what he is looking for. The girls fought over who was going to push Daddy's wheel chair and truly enjoyed helping him. We had lots of laughs and highly enjoyed ourselves.

We had to park in a parking garage down in Silver Springs, MD. When we went to leave a lady asked me if that was my husband and I said yes. Then she asked is he at Walter Reed, I said yes. Then she says give me your parking ticket. I said excuse me. She says, please it is the least I can do. Unfortunately we had not been there long enough to be charged for parking so she was disappointed. I made it up to her by taking her to meet Chaz. She thanked him for his service. I told her about the Team Allen site and she told us she'd be checking in on us.
Isn't it great that amazing people are still out there?! I love that you never know where the kindness of strangers will show up!
=) Jessica

New Normal

What's does normal look like for us now?

I get up at 6am, this hasn't changed. I get my self ready and enjoy the peace and quiet because the rest of the day will be filled with "Hey, Mom" and/or "Hey, Jess." Usually Chaz stirs long enough for me to give him his Lovonox shot (he had a small blot clot a few months ago) and his meds. Then I make him go back to sleep. Everyone starts stirring around 8ish. I then have to get the three of them dressed, brushed (teeth & hair) and fed. Then we're off to PT and OT.
Chaz is very fortunate to have such excellent therapists. They make everything so much easier. He usually finishes all his therapies in just enough time to go get lunch. We usually dine in his room. We've tried to eat in the cafeteria, but it has been packed lately. Right now we get him for an overnight pass, but we have to check in everyday to be able to get another pass. So the other reason we have lunch in his room is so all the doctors can see him and see that he is still doing very well. You've got to love multi-tasking.
Once everyone has passed through to see Chaz and take his vitals. We get another overnight pass. I have been told when I come back I should get a 3 day pass for the weekend because everything is going so well. In case you are wondering, why are we still in the hospital. Chaz is remaining as an inpatient until he gets his elbow surgery. Once he heals to their liking we will be out of there for good. We could go outpatient now, but to us is doesn't make any sense to check out to turn around and check back in. Chaz really likes his nurses and fears if he checks out and back in he may go to a different Ward. So we will just take passes and do what we have to do! It's very fustrating that the elbow is holding us up! Since we are in an Army hospital we are actually involved in the decision process. In the civilian world, we would have been kicked out at 20 times by now. This is one more thing we are thankful for!
Weleave and  have dinner at the Fisher House. Usually I cook. We are not big fast food/ eating out people. My family enjoys my cooking, so I cook away! Best of all, we have a full kitchen now, which is awesome!! I highly enjoy the Fisher House kitchen. Chaz asked me yesterday if it was the one I wanted. I said I would not complain, at all. It is very user friendly.
We usually let the kiddos play with the other kiddos. Then we snuggle up, watch a movie and go to bed. Sounds super simple, but I have to dose out a bunch of meds (at 6A, 10A, 2P, 6P and 10P) and give two shots to Chaz everyday. He also has a powerchair that we dodge all day, so we can keep our toes. Chaz also has special chairs for every bathroom function. He has already mastered them. I am telling you the man is a rockstar!!!!

The important thing is we areall  doing extremely well. The social worker and child shrink have signed off that they are not concerned about the girls at all. They observed them for hours and said they were amazed at how well they are adjusted. Of course Chaz still has a lot of checkmarks to get through, but it is all hanging on that elbow. They have told us more than once we are ready to go! But we have to finish that elbow. The doctors said we have a lot to talk about next week. Chaz is having more blood drawn today to see if his body is ready for the surgery. If he is, then we can get this last phase rocking.  
Please keep those prayers coming. We want this elbow surgery to be a huge success. The elbow is the hardest joint on your body to repair. The doctors are even concerned about the elbow. They have even suggested Chaz keep it fused, but this is not what he wants, so we are going to be going for it! Please pray hard for his elbow and the doctors and surgeons who will be working on it. God is listening, talk to him!
=) Jessica

Wow! What a Day!!

God is great, but I fear your heart can burst from too much joy?! Just kidding!! What an amazing day yesterday?! I was just excited because the kids would get to see Chaz's new legs. But no my rock star of a hubby has to stand up in them and then once he got his balance he starts to step.

Since Chaz's legs have healed so well they decided last Wednesday to push forward with ordering his legs. I was a little shocked, but trust me these people know what they are doing. When I left last Wednesday the prosthetic people put him in his suction cup shrinkers. They then decided he would come back down that afternoon and would be cast so they make the tops of his legs. He even got to pick out his shoes. He laughed because he had to go down one size for right now. That is so he can maintain his balance to height ratio. Friday he got the call that they would be ready on Monday. I shrieked because I knew our girls would be here.

So yesterday morning off when went to the prosthesis's lab. The girls were a little intimidated because there were so many people. We had several doctors and nurses who wanted to see Chaz stand. In the lab, he stood up and that's when I took the pic of him standing with the girls. This was of course after I dried my face from the happy tears! I was not the only one with tears, trust me. It was an incredible moment. One I will always cherish and it was even better because our girls were there. Mike (prosthesis expert) made marks on them so he could fix them real quick and then we took him to the MATC (Physical Therapy room).

Bo (prosthesis therapist, lady in the melon colored shirt in pics) got him up and then he went for the step. She let him go for it. He took a few steps and then we had him take a break and Mike made more corrections and then we got him to do some of his stretches. He then decided he wanted to go one more round with the legs. That round he walked all the way down the bars turned around and walked back and sat down! Believe it or not, there were no tears here, I was too shocked.

I have to admit I am a little upset that Chaz never told me he was such a rock star. I always knew he was absolutely amazing. That's why I said "I do". I am bursting with pride over the amount of determination he has. I have always been proud of his accomplishments. This would be why I have a love me wall for him in our office to celebrate his awards. It is hard to describe the level of pride you have to see someone you love so much take a huge hit and then laugh about it and kick it's ass! One thing is for sure, God sent me the right man. I am so thankful for that!

Once we were done with all that excitement we went back to Chaz's room for lunch. Once again our cuties were a little overwhelmed with all of the people. But luckily they were the right people, it was the crew of doctors who authorize passes for Chaz. I then put the girls in front of me and then ask for an overnight pass for Chaz. Oh yes, I used our girls. But every one of you reading this would have done the exact same thing. You know his lead doctor didn't even bat an eye and said yes. De was so excited. After they walked away she asked "Does that mean we get to keep him at home tonight." (Yes they are calling the Fisher House home). When I told her yes she smiled from ear to ear.

The rest of the day was spent with the girls taking turns pushing daddy around, playing video games and playing on the playground. A group of volunteers brought the Fisher House Families a yummy Irish dinner and we feasted and met a few new faces. It was nice to eat with some new and old faces and enjoy the beautiful evening.

I can only wonder what God has in store for us today! I hope it's another beautiful day full of smiles and laughter. But never less, our little family is together and we are loving every second of it!
=) Jessica

Our Reunion Day!!!

For those of you who don't know my mom and step dad live about 10 minutes from the airport. It made more sense to stay Saturday night with them and jump on our 10AM flight. The girls loved this idea. They got to sleep over with Grannie and Papa and then go see Daddy. What's not to love?!

As usual I was up at 6ish, but I wanted to wait until 730ish to wake them. De woke up on her own, but Ry happily woke up when I reminded her what we were doing. They were eager to wear their new dresses from Miss Joann (which were freaking adorable, weren't they). Grannie spoiled them with pancakes and Aunt Shelly got to see us off as we walked out the door.

I think we had the fastest unloading at the airport curb for 3 people ever. It was crazy. Those girls were booking it. Ry said more than once that she wasn't missing that plane. We grabbed our passes and went onto security. I was very nervous about the girls and security but one of the TSA guys remembered me from bringing Chaz a heart shaped pillow and blanket (thanks to our NEES family) and told me to come to him. He pushed us straight one through. He said, "Gotta scan your bags, but we know where you're going."

I took the girls down to the play area to run out a little energy before they were packed into the plane. We then went to sit and wait. The attendant then asked for the passenger with the last name of Allen. I went up there to see what was going on. They asked if I could switch seats. I pointed to the girls and said, "Uh no, we're a package deal." The female attendant began to freak out, so I had to ask what is the problem. She informed me that the explosive dog need to be in my seat and they didn't know what they were going to do. I said does the handler have a seat and she says yes right next to you. I said well then I guess we're good. She then informs me that I will not have enough foot room due to the size of the dog. I then said, "So if I agree to possibly lose my foot room can we board this plane." She says, "Yes, this is what is holding us up." I then look at the handler and ask him if he's cool with it and asked if he was an Army dog. He says yes and yes. I then inform him we're family and then look at the attendant and tell her let's board this plane.

So we got settled and I made a new friend. The dog was more nervous the girls were. The dog provided the perfect distraction. He loved me so much that he tried to put all of his 85 pounds in my lap. The handler and I held that poor thing for the majority of the trip. The girls had to shake me off when we landed because I had so much dog hair on me. By the way I had no problems with leg room. That dog was awesome and his handler was too.

Adam and Donna greeted us off the plane and we loaded up to head to the house. Chaz called to let me know he didn't care what I brought him as long as it was food. Ry began to pout and informed me, "I don't want to stop anywhere. I want my Daddy." I told her that her Daddy was hungry and he needed to be fed. She did get over it once we let her choose the restaurant.

We walked into the Fisher House and began to walk past Chaz. He was sitting in the Family room. The girls paused and then ran to their Daddy. Deryn looked at him and almost cried until he grabbed her. That of course made me tear up. She knew he was ok, but it has to be hard to be 5 and 8 and see you Daddy in a wheel chair. He looks absolutely fabulous, but that is their Daddy and it takes a moment to digest it. Before we left and in the car ride over I gave them the breakdown of what he looks like. But it is still one of those things you have to digest once you actually see it. Chaz immediately healed their wounds. He grabbed them and provided them with the reassurance that everything is and will be ok. It took Ry a little longer to digest it, but the pictures tell the whole story. The girls are great, Chaz is great and I am great. Those smiles are not fake, nor forced.

Our girls are so happy here at the Fisher House. Deryn has already made a new friend and I'm sure Ry will too once we find someone close to her age. The girls left Chaz and I to talk with our friends and they played on the playground and in our room. It was amazing to see the peace that seeing Chaz brought them. They were just so happy to be in the same area as him.

On March 20, we officially began our new normal! What an amazing day?! I couldn't have planned anything better than what happened. As I reflect on the day, I still can't believe how wonderful it was. It was amazing to have all of my guilt go away. For now Chaz and I get to have our little family altogether and we are so thankful for it. We will have to return to our one week here, one week there schedule very soon, but Chaz and I realized we only have 8 weeks of that and then we are together for good. We've already done 8 weeks and look at how fast those flew by.

I have no idea what all we will do this week. Chaz was completely shocked that I haven't planned anything. Yes guys, I haven't planned anything. I figured we're only here for a week and that will fly by. Why should I make plans now?! We'll be in DC all summer. We have plenty of time to do things. For one week, I just want to enjoy our family. Being able to have meals together and watch movies is more than enough for me! I am just so thankful to have my family together!

Again we thank you all for your prayers and support! I promise I will keep posting pics as fast as I can. I know you are all as excited as we are. I hope you also have a great week!

=) Jessica

Waiting to take off at the airport

Striking a Pose

Excitement!!!!

So many exciting things are going on around our house. The four of us have waited very patiently for tomorrow. God has been so great! Chaz has healed so well he can now go out on passes. He will get some passes while the girls are there. He may even get overnight passes. Fingers crossed!!

There are so many blessings going on in our lives and we will reveal them all to you as they come along. Let's just put it to you this way. God has lined up all these amazing people in our lives right now to help us on this road. He is making this journey absolutely amazing!!! God is proving that if you put your faith in him he will carry you through any storm and he will reward you for your faithfulness. God is GREAT!!

Here are some of my favorite highlights from the past few days!
Thursday Chaz and the girls made a grocery list (via speakerphone) and planned out the first 3 meals for me to cook when we are up there. They have also decided on the cake we need to make to celebrate our 2nd month anniversary of his Alive Day!

Thursday night Ry was crying because she wanted to see Daddy. I told her if she went to sleep we would be one day closer. So she did and she woke up and said "it worked!!"

The girls are planning Daddy's exercise routine, because De says she knows some things that will help him. They will be following their excerises with smoothies.

We are ready for an amazing week!
Go Team Allen!!!!!

Chaz's Wound

For those of you who don't know Chaz's first skin graft did not fully take on the first try. Last week they took him in on Wednesday to try it again. On Wednesday they re-grafted his skin and then put a wound vac on it and restricted his activity for 5 days. Today was day 6 so the dressings and vac came off. I am pleased to report that it looks like 99.5% of it took. There's a very small part that lifted when the bandage came off but 3 out of 4 doctors weren't worried. The one that was worried also once told us that Chaz's hand wouldn't get to where it is. Remember people doctors are only practicing medicine. Once again Chaz is living proof of the power of prayer!

So we are back on course and we are waiting for the cadaver surgery, which will be sometime in April. We will be getting passes out of the hospital on a frequent basis and if all goes well he will get to stay the night with the girls and I at the Fisher House at least once while they are here. As of today he will remain inpatient, so I will continue the one week here, one week there until that surgery.

Keep those prayers coming!!!
=) Jessica

Petraeus

Super cool story, here it goes....
So when we first got to WRAMC I was leaving some stuff in Chaz's room and heading down to see him in Recovery (after one of many surgeries). As I walk out, I literally almost bumped into Holly Petraeus. She said hi and I proceeded to tell her how impressed I am with her as a military spouse. Then she and I had a great conversation about military life. She then informed me of her new job with the consumer protection bureau and I told her what I do and that I won that fellowship with the FINRA this year. She then asked me for my email. I thought, um ok. She gave me hers and I gave her mine and never thought I'd hear from her and then 10 days later poof an email from her and she and I have been emailing back and forth since.

Then the last time I came up she emailed me to let me know she was bringing the British Ambassador's wife to meet us. So we met again and that time she met Chaz. Then emailed me to let me know she told her hubby to get over here to meet us. (I am seriously not making this stuff up!)

So Howard (guy from Executive Services) grabs me Wednesday when I returned to tell me I have to have Chaz and myself in Chaz's room today. Someone has requested to see us. I ask who, he says General Petraeus. Of I think he's fluffing it up and now today I find out he's not kidding.

General Petraeus walks in the room and says, "Finally I get to meet Team Allen." He then tells us his wife has not stopped talking about us. We got to visit with him for awhile. It was funny to see that you cannot rush a 4 star general. Then he coined us (Donna too) and signed Chaz's flag (pic later). He then says, "Where did my wife sign?" We look and realized she didn't sign. He says, "Good I've got one on her. I'll make sure she gets back over here." Then we took the picture with him and then asks if I have internet on my phone I said yes and then he says, "Email that to Holly now and make sure you tell her she forgot to sign the flag. She needs to come take a picture too."

Great story, huh?!

What We Now Know...

We will be in DC for the summer. The doctors are closely watching Chaz's elbow. Basically the elbow is holding everything up. But if we are patient we will be rewarded. The cadaver soon be ready and Chaz will have almost full function to right elbow again. His shoulder and wrist and hand are coming right along just fine. The nerve that goes to your pinky is damaged but he can still move his hand and can even grab a cup now.

When school is over I will bring the girls up here to live with us. For right now, we will stay at the Fisher House. I have already applied for the Army's ADA fully furnished apartments for families with soldiers with Chaz's types of injuries. The earliest we can get into those is May. I think we'll be here until January, but I am not a doctor. I don't want to be here that long, but that silly elbow likes to control the situation. The doctors said Chaz will be here for 4-6 months just for the elbow. His legs are moving right along and he'll have prosthetic legs soon. I have been told when we build our new home we need to build a leg room for all the legs he is going to have. Also we are waiting for Ft Campbell to finish establishing a program similar to the one here at WRAMC so we can finish our Army stuff there and move on with our new normal.

We will not be selling our home at this point. Our family needs to have a place to return to. I do not know all of the details, but I do know we have enough family and friends to support us and make everything work out. We cannot bring pets here so that will be another issue I will have to work out. Allegedly I will get to bring Chaz home on leave in June/ July. If so we will go to our home to see what else we need to do to stay in DC for the extended time. Eventually we will buy land and begin construction on our new home.

The other problem is WRAMC is closing down this summer/ fall. If Chaz was to be moved today we would go to Bethesda. But there's also a chance he'd go to Fort Belvoir, VA when this is all said and done. To be honest, the Army has no idea where they are sending us and this will definitely be interesting. Both facilities are set up like WRAMC and that's the important thing. Chaz will continue to receive the same level of care.

If we are here for the school year, the girls will either go to Fairfax County, VA or Montgomery County, MD schools. The Army will not allow Army dependents into DC schools. What does that tell you?!

Now you know as much as we do. Please pray that the right decisions will be made and Chaz will continue to heal as well as he has. One thing is for sure the Allens are going to have a great summer and we will be utilizing every opportunity we have to make this the best for us.

Thanks again for all of your prayers and support!!
=) Jessica

Team Allen Fund

Since I love to work with non-profits, I know how important it is that donors know where their money is going. The fund was originally started by our awesome friends so I could pay for all of my plane tickets. Well Hero Miles is now paying for all of those. So the next thing would be for our expenses while in DC. The Army is taking care of Chaz's needs, but you can imagine there are many things that we will still need. We do not have a timeline for how long we will be here. We should get one when Chaz gets to the outpatient stage. But we will still be here in DC for the outpatient phase.

When we finally get to come home we will have to build a new home. Our currently home is two stories. All of our bedrooms and bathrooms are upstairs. Although Chaz will be getting his "Lt. Dan" legs his life will be easier if we have a one story home. Therefore we will be building a new one in Clarksville. Chaz has 13 years in the Army and we have decided to finish out  his 20 with the Army. The Army is allowing to choose where we want to go and we have decided to return to Ft Campbell. Chaz should be reclassing (Civilians this is where he changes jobs) to something else besides Infantry. He will not deploy again (I don't care what I have to do) so I have zero problems with him staying in the Army. Plus I want him to stay in because I think he'll have better opportunities for advancements for amputees. The Army is working on some amazing things and Active Duty will be first in line for these things and I want the best for him. We've already done 13 years, what's a few more?! What happened to Chaz is not the Army's fault. It is just one of those things that we don't understand why it happens, but we will make the best out of it.

Now back to this house. I have never built a house, much less a ADA compliant home. I have no idea how much this will cost but the more money we can apply to it will be less we have to finance. Any funds from the Allen Fund will go to the construction of this home. I have just begun to skim the surface on this one. I am saving and working to put back as much money as possible for this home. I am aware of some of the grants, but I am a planner and I have to do everything by myself, therefore I am planning to save and save to afford our new home. If we are approved for the grants, then great we can put money towards our our other idea.

Any funds left from the Allen Fund will go to begin our non-profit. We've already discussed how we can pay this forward. We're thinking about a scholarship fund to start with. Then we'd like to open some type of center to help people. I love teaching people about finances and how to better themselves. Most importantly I like to put the power back in their hands and take it out of the companies who try to steal your money. Chaz loves computers. He is so incredible with them. He loves sharing this gift. He also likes to help people take back the power rather than being taken advantage of my big companies. We both love to help people and love to teach the things we are good at. We could better the world by sharing these skills.

Again thank you for your support. Your support helps us keep going. Chaz and I talk about the incredible support we have received every day. We are so thankful for each and every one of you. Your words, cards, prayers, all of it makes everyday easier. We hope you know that we are thrilled about the T-shirts. We think it's pretty cool, but we are at a loss for words. All we can say is thank you. You cannot imagine what it's like in our shoes. We could choose to dwell on the drama or celebrate the miracle. We appreciate each and every one of you and that you are lifting us up. God is going to see us through all of this. He hears each and every one of us and has the Allen family in his hands. We are happy to have each of you on our team to keep moving this miracle moving forward.
Thanks again!=) Jessica

Great Reading for Today!!!

People keep asking me how I do it....This is how I believe and this is how I get through each day. I remind myself with these words. I hope this will bring a smile to you today! I always remember we are God's children and if He is for us, then nothing can defeat us! Want to be lifted up, grab one of Joel's books! They are fabulous!!
Have a Great day!! =) Jessica

TODAY’S SCRIPTURE
“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose”  (Romans 8:28, NIV)

TODAY’S WORD from Joel and Victoria
God has a plan to take every adversity and every hardship you go through and use it. He’s not going to beat you down and make your life miserable. No, God’s dream is to take that difficulty and supernaturally turn it around and use it to bring you good. He will use those tough times to bring you out stronger, more mature and prepared for promotion! Goodness, mercy and unfailing love are God’s plan for you!
You may not understand everything that’s going on in your life right now, but I encourage you to keep your head held high. Know that God is working in your life. Keep being faithful. Keep doing the right thing, knowing that in the end God is going to turn things around in your favor. If God is for you, who can be against you? No one. Greater is the One who is in you than anyone who can be against you. No matter what’s going on around you today, you can put your shoulders back and put a smile on your face because God is working things together for your good because He loves you!

A PRAYER FOR TODAY
Father in heaven, thank You for Your goodness and faithfulness in my life. Thank You for all You’ve done for me in my past and for what You are preparing for my future. Help me keep my eyes on You and stand strong as I look for Your goodness all the days of my life. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.
— Joel & Victoria Osteen

Countdown!!!

The week of March 20 cannot get here fast enough. I seriously don't know who is the most excited out of the four of us. The girls can't wait to see their Daddy, he can't wait to see them and Chaz and I both just can't wait to have everyone in the same room at the same time. Our family will be together, finally and I can finally have a week free of guilt.

I have carried so much guilt since I began my travels back and forth. I feel guilty that I am missing things with our girls. I have missed dance events, Girl Scouts and just the little everyday things we all take for granted. Then when I'm in TN, I feel guilty that I am not there for Chaz. But within a few days, I will be guilt free for a week and before I know it our family will be together and this will all be just a memory. I have never wanted to fast forward time, but I am ready to hit that button. I know Chaz does too. He and I are ready to get on with our new normal.

I am thankful for all of the deployments we've been through. I truly believe going through them has made all of this easier. The girls and I have been separated from Chaz time and time again. We've been apart for a few weeks to 18 months. So this separation is minor to us and best of all we can call him pretty much whenever we want and Deryn loves the fact that she can text her Daddy. It is wonderful to have the priviledge of communication back in your hands. We all take it for granted but when you can celebrate the little things the bigger things are even greater!

Here are a few of my favorite quotes from the girls.
Deryn, "Daddy says I can exercise with him. I am so going to teach him some good stuff."

Ryann, "So does Daddy have to go back to big work (deployments) now that he's hurt?
" Me. "Nope he's all ours now." Ryann, "Good cause I am so tired of big work."

Thanks again for your prayers and support!!!
=) Jessica

Thanks!!!!

WOW!! Team Allen's facebook page is over 1000 likes, that is crazy. Chaz and I talked about it last night and we just don't know what to say. Thank you just doesn't seem like enough. We have been so blessed by your prayers, meals, cards, calls and even more. I wanted to take a few minutes to say thank you for being our cheerleaders. Thank you for buying the T-shirts. I cannot wait for Chaz to see them walking around in person. I told him how awesome it is and how words cannot describe how cool it is to see people walking around in a T-shirt designed to support your husband. But to be him and see people wearing shirts for you has to be sureal. Our girls think it is so cool that shirts were made just for their Daddy.

Thank you Demetria Hale for everything you've done! Our families met in the early 80s and she and I have stayed in touch with her over the years. She is the brainchild behind the site, T-shirts, banner, etc. She has done an amazing job and thank you just isn't enough! I know she knows how much we appreciate her. But we know we'll never be able to show her just how much! Who would have ever thought those little girls playing in the playhouse in Morrison TN would grow up and go through this journey together!?! We are so grateful for you! Thank you!!

All of our NEES, FT Campbell, ADE, GS, KD, KWC, WCHS, Mom's Club, WRAMC peeps you are all amazing!! You have made this all easier to go through. You have lifted us up and helped made the road smoother. We could not do this alone and who would want to. Thank you for going on this journey with us and thank you for your neverending support!!
Much love to you all!!
=) Jessica

Fisher House!!

I just got the best news!!! We have a room at the Fisher House!!! We were told it would be months before we would get in. I got a call today that we trumped everyone. (I really want to know who made that call). They said Chaz and I have sacrificed enough and this was the least that could be done for us. Kind of cool huh?! I really hope I don't meet the familes that they put us in front of!

Now we will have a home away from home that is closer to the hospital. Donna and Adam have given me a lovely place to stay, but now I can stop being a leech on them (I know you guys are reading this. You know how independent I am (big kiss here).

If you don't know about the Fisher House then go check them out. It is amazing! I was also told that the Fisher House will be keeping a close eye on me. They manager said he heard I do too much and that I don't know how to recieve. So whoever made the call, obviously knows me well.
Also when Chaz gets to leave his room I will be able to take him there. WAHOO!!!!! This is a huge victory for Team Allen!!!