When your soldier is injured you have every right to choose how to share your journey, if you choose to share it at all. Let me tell you there is absolutely no right way to share your journey. I have just followed my gut during the whole journey. I have confessed that I don't have all the answers, I just let God lead me.
In the first few weeks following January 22, 2011, I refused all media. I did not want to talk to anyone, which I bet you can totally understand. But when Demetria came up with the Team Allen idea it was the right idea at the right time. Her idea allowed me to share what was going on with us when and how we wanted to. As time passed we were able to share what we were learning in addition to our journey to healing. I love learning so I love that we have been able to share our lessons with others who are on this road or are following behind us.
We realize we are a lot more public than most and we chose this path. We hope that by sharing our journey with others, we will help just one person. If we help just one person on this road then it's all been worth it. Because that one person will help one other person and it will keep going. We'll never know how many people we have helped on this journey, but I know we have helped a few and that means so much to us. We are blessed by our families, friends and communities that love us so much and want us to succeed. We are so thankful that the people who support us so much want to share our journey with others in their lives.
But choosing to be public also comes with some responsibility. You have to know that the many people truly care about your family. They want to see you live happily ever after. It's just not fair to allude to devastating things and then leave people to think the worst. When I see this go on, I automatically think to what are your true intentions?! Is this really about your soldier or is this really about you?! It all goes back to my favorite quote from Margaret Thatcher about watching your thoughts because ultimately it shows your true character. When people post these drama-laced statements it shows me exactly who they are and what their intentions are. To me it's better to say nothing at all then to make a statement and then fall off the grid.
I heard someone once say that fame is like a drug. We all have people in our lives who love the attention. We all know it's always nice to get attention. We all want to feel like we're important. But using someone's illness or injury to make yourself feel better is just not cool at all. Unfortunately we've seen this a few times.
People crack me up. I don't like drama at all, so I don't know why you want to encourage it. I always love it when people say stuff like, "I'm not trying to cause trouble, but..." Yeah whatever follows that but is going to be trouble and we all know it. You told us that in the beginning of your sentence. So if you really don't want to cause trouble, then just keep quiet. That's really the only way to not cause trouble. I don't know your circumstance, but if you keep the drama to a minimum you'll find out your life will get better. Remember when in doubt, leave it out. Or as Thumper said, "If you can't say something nice, don't say nothing at all."
I never understood why there were so many medical drama shows until all this happened to Chaz and now I know why. Hospitals are full of drama. What I also learned is people love their drama. I guess since they are now canceling soap operas people are bored and they have to create their own soap opera. Well this girl says no thank you! I'll stay in my happy bubble. Drama pisses me off, just ask our daughters. I tell them all the time I don't deal with drama queens so let me know when you are over it.
I cut my ties with drama queens quick. When every time I am around you it's drama, drama, drama, I will just move along. When I see your Facebook posts are drama, drama, drama, I hide you so I don't see you or in some cases I delete you. Life is so great and full of fabulous if you take the time to appreciate it. I am all about helping but I have had to cut ties with families who want to fan the fire rather than put it out.
Healing a wounded warrior brings its own load of drama, you totally do not need to add to it. If you choose to be public with your journey please don't add to the drama. And if you choose to be public please do not toy with the emotions of the people who are desperately praying for your success. This road is so very hard, why would you do anything to make it harder?! Why would you want to put people in a tizzy?! I guess I'll just never understand.....